I should just get 'SUCKER' tatooed on my forehead :-(

But have I learned a lesson from it? ABSOLUTELY. I will NEVER AGAIN just hand cash over to MN and MS with the task to go pick out some decent and affordable summer clothes.

Over the course of the past year of FINALLY having the girls shared placement we have dedicated a healthy amount of time toward teaching them the much needed skill of spending wisely and being very cost conscious. Sybil marries men for money and when she milks them dry she leaves them for someone that has more. It's a simple fact at this point so I won't beat around the bush. The girls have learned from watching her over the years and know nothing of financial limitations, budgets or restrictions. It's amazing how fast they can burn through cash. I recall the first time I took them seriously shopping. They would bring me something and say "can I get this?" and I would respond "How much is it?" And they had no idea and didn't think it mattered or was important. Since then we give them guidelines - $15-$20 for a pair of jeans is reasonable, $50 is not (unless they shrink your thighs, turn your ass into a 'happen'en onion' and make you look 2 sizes smaller - then price is no object but they don't need to know that.) ALWAYS ALWAYS go to the clearance rack first and work your way out of the store. T.J. Maxx., Marshall's, Ross etc. are your friends and Abercrombie is only for when you have a gift card. We don't have a budget for full price brand names so neither do they.

As I stated, over the past year they were getting a lot better. Making the right decisions....UNTIL.....I trusted them with $300 in cash ($150 a piece) to get summer clothes last weekend. We were crazy busy and I didn't have time to take them. I told them "Here you go, be wise, and make it stretch."

They mentioned a few things they got when we crossed paths the next day. "Oh I got some skirts (MS is in a short flirty skirt streak) and MN got some jeans." I was like "What?" she giggles and I figured I must have misunderstood. The next morning they're getting ready for school and sure shit MN has new frayed/worn look ABERCROMBIE jeans on that she rolled up mid calf. I was like- "Those your new jeans?" She's like "yeah you like em?" I said- "That's not summer clothes- how much do you have left?"...she responds "I dunno." as they scurry out the door.

I AM FREAKING TICKED. So I dart up to their bedroom, all the bags sitting there empty- not a price tag or receipt to be found. They are back to square one with me now. I need to babysit their every freaking purchase now. What a huge disappointment.
GRRRRRR…….NEVER AGAIN.

3 Freaks, 2 cars, 1 stepdaughter...Priceless

In an email back in late January after being asked if she was willing to go in on a car for MS, Sybil stated that she could not afford to. Then when being asked if her parents (psychotic- overindulging freaks) were giving or buying MS a car she said ‘No’. MS may be able to drive one of theirs for after school stuff but that’s it.

So, we proceeded to search for a reasonable and dependable vehicle for MS, found one, bought it and told her that it was our car but she would be using it to get back and forth from school etc. while she was with us. Since it was in our name, we couldn’t very well let her use it when she wasn’t under our supervision (Sybil lets her do just about anything she wants.) So we decided we just can’t expose ourselves to that type of liability issue.

So Sybil’s psycho parents have given her a car to use all the time-even while she’s with us. Interesting how we are informed of this AFTER we have already purchased a vehicle for her to drive. So YAY for MS- now she is one of the rare and elite teenagers who have two vehicles at her disposal. Ugh. Now comes the issue with insurance. We insure her on our end for the jaw dropping –eye popping astounding amount of $1100 per year (why do I feel like I have just been violated?) And so I presume that they (Sybil and her agents) will be doing the same??? Hmmmm. Seems pretty silly huh? I’m checking with our agent to find out if there is a ‘partial placement’ discount. I’m guessing NOT.

Is it wrong of me to think the Sybil and her parents did this intentionally? Yes…there really ARE dumb questions.

Sybil’s maddening entitlement issues

As a stay at home ‘mom’ –and I use that term very loosely with this woman…one would think Sybil would be a little more appreciative of the fact that Norm has such great health benefits. Now- there is absolutely no reason whatsoever that Sybil needs to stay at home anymore since all her children are in school but that's a whole nother issue. There has been a constant battle since the beginning of Norm and Sybil’s split about uninsured medical expenses- co pays and the excess in which the insurance company doesn’t cover. Which, btw is typically minimal unless of course you’re a serious hypochondriac with Munchausen by proxy tendencies (Sybil to a T). Sybil tends to drag MS and MN to the doctor for every little cough or sniffle…demanding they run tests and take x-rays etc. It has frustrated us beyond reality that we’ve had to pay for half of medical expenses almost solely due to her extreme behavior.

Lately (over the past year or so) to add insult to injury, she has actually complained about the “fact” that she has to pay for half of OUR family deductible. I am quite certain her anti-Christ-like parents have planted this load of crap seed in her puny brain because everyone knows she’s not smart enough to have come up with this on her own. The irony about the situation is this – out of the 5 individuals of OUR family that the deductible covers- MS and MN go to the doctor the most. Me, Norm and Normonster are rarely sick much less go to the Dr. It only makes sense that she’s going to be paying for half of the deductible since she drags them to the Dr all the time.

Looking at the big picture- she should be so grateful that Norm’s insurance coverage is still so good. She should feel pretty f-ing lucky he has a job at all in this economy to support her lazy ass. Instead she has to bitch and wine that she’s getting the short end of the stick. This is just ONE little teeny tiny example of how she feels entitled and like the world and especially MY HUSBAND owes her.

I want to be JUST LIKE HER when I grow up. ((((shudder))))

MS's 'surprise' Sweet 16 party

So the horrible, neglectful and selfish Norm and I took a vacation to Mexico over Spring Break. We haven't taken a vaca together just the two of us for over 3 years and since prices were right we jumped on it. MS's 16th birthday happen to fall on Easter Sunday and so we missed it...BUT we took her and her sister and friend to a hotel and they got to swim and celebrated with family etc. Oh yeah and we bought her a car.. nothing much.

We got back and before we got the girls we had already heard about MS's sweet 16 party. Sybil and her psycho parents rented a hall, had her invite 75 of her closest friends, invited every relative they could think of and had a FORMAL party for her. When I mean formal, it was Formal dress required. We know Sybil's aunt and she told us she was mortified when she showed up in a nice pantsuit to be extremely underdressed. A cousin of theirs we know refused to go because she was not renting a tux for her husband and buying a new formal gown for her second cousins birthday party.

Come to find out MS...who is a sophomore...didn't get asked to Prom (which is a Junior Prom BTW) so her extremely loving and supportive mother came in to save the day by giving her ...her own prom. This is the same woman that can't afford to pay her bills , nor reimburse us for bills we've paid and is filing bankruptcy and her dad lost his job a while back. I can't wait to see what they'll do for her if she doesn't go to her Junior Prom...although then again, She'll BE a Junior so she'll just go with friends.

Man, I sound bitter. Hmpf..oh well.

Mini-Sybil and the act of Sexting

We received a call last Sunday from the father of a boy who was apparently Sexting with MS. Many of the ‘messages’ involved pictures. (Blech- I reviewed them this morning.) I honestly can’t say I’m surprised in the least. Despite our constant monitoring of her online activity, her cell phone has been a bit more challenging since she deletes all incoming and outgoing messages as soon as possible. Sybil’s parents are the cell phone providers so we can’t destroy them or cancel them and once she leaves our home it is immediately given back to her despite her behavior (I am certain the most recent behavior will have no impact on this ritual either.)

Sadly, she is mimicking her mother’s behavior almost to the letter. Last Summer- through MS’s Myspace we discovered she had access to her mother’s boyfriend’s MySpace account (follow me there?). His account had a buffet of inappropriate content much of which involved her own mother. Since Sybil is absolutely worshiped by her daughters, especially MS, it was pretty much inevitable that she would follow in her footsteps with the grand desire to “be like Mom.” That, has now come to fruition.

The boy’s parents are none too happy with him, and want to meet so that he can apologize to us. MS will be mortified…as she should be. Should be an interesting weekend.

I’m going to go though up now.

Sybil Saga (part V)

So, WWII actually consisted of a series of small battles- most which we won. First and foremost- and most critical was to ensure that the Custody Evaluator from WWI was reassigned to the case. This woman was pretty much on the fence the last time around put felt compelled to leave things in the hands of the therapists in hopes that they would keep the best interest of the girls in mind. Unfortunately, she was mistaken and the therapist had only themselves in mind. This time around…by golly she was going to make it right (and maybe save face a bit too) and make sure the girls were not left behind.

Victory number 2 was GAL (Guardian ad Litem) selection. Our attorney made a recommendation as to a very experienced GAL who would do it at a discount. Her atty made a recommendation as to someone that favored mothers…and the judge went with our recommendation. He ended up being very down to earth and relied a lot on the Custody Evaluator’s recommendation given her familiarity with the case. He was older and not overly impressed with Sybil and her antics unlike the green, pompous, jack ass we had the first time around who thought Sybil was mother of the year.

Battle number 3 was to get a temporary order in place. It had been years since we had had an increase in placement and it was long overdue. Sybil was adamant that the girls couldn’t handle an increase in their ‘fragile’ state and they would regress and it would do nothing but damage. Unfortunately due to the bullshit involved with legal antics and Sybil’s antics she was able to stall any temporary orders by “willingly” negotiating toward a settlement. During this timeframe, her attorney (and friend) withdrew and filed a judgment against her so she ended up representing herself.

The settlement was reached –of course on the morning of the first day of trial (a.k.a. at the very last possible moment so as not to allow us any additional time with the girls prior.) It basically came down to money for Sybil. The fact that she had no representation and had no money for a new attorney and that the Judge was not going to postpone trial any longer backed her into a corner and forced her hand. That was almost exactly a year ago today.

The stipulation consisted of incremental placement increases in a stepwise manner (that I basically wrote up) to be increase to shared placement within 3 months time. At that time, child support was to be adjusted according to the state guidelines. That- the GAL wrote up, was way too f-ing vague. At that time I think it was safe enough to put a set amount in place but hindsight is 20/20. 3 months later Sybil was less than cooperative to settle on the child support adjustment so it was off to court yet again. To add insult to injury, her and Mark’s divorce was well underway and she was raking him across the coals financially. She ended up getting a ton from him and still getting a ton from us when we had the girls half the time.

She could of course afford to hire an attorney again so she lawyered up to battle the child support issue (which was more important to her anyway.) The biggest argument was of course whether or not income could or should be imputed. Sybil had agreed to an imputed wage during her settlement with Mark so we felt it was safe to use it with our calculation- She and her atty of course didn’t think so. Add to it that she was getting alimony –which is considered income. She and her attorney argued that it could not. At the end of the day, we had an overly sympathetic judge to Sybil’s cause. She did retro the modification so we calculated what she owed us and she’s still in the process of paying us back and child support was cut in half. What amazed me about this last trial were some of the last words I heard Sybil speak. When asked why she had not gotten another job, she actually got on the stand and under oath stated as sadly as possible to the judge and to my attorney “I…sniff sniff, have no potential.” My jaw dropped as it registered in my brain and proved to me as to the lengths she would go and levels she would stoop, to be totally and completely financially supported by someone else. How could my husband ever have found this woman attractive? I will never know.

Sociopath or Seditious

Mini-Sybil is my 15 year old step daughter. By far she is the most damaged and brainwashed by Sybil and her clan. They have fed her so much garbage that that’s all she knows in addition to her possibly having a chemical imbalance that has been addressed, she is very weak, insecure and doesn’t have the highest IQ. I’m not trying to be mean…I’m simply stating what I know. We knew going into this that she would be our biggest challenge because she has gone to the dark side, but so far it’s been ok.

The definition of OK in this situation is this: She is sweet and kind and respectful to your face. Acts very innocent and doesn’t push the envelope verbally or behaviorally when she’s with us. She goes online via facebook or myspace and the real MS shows up. It’s loaded with profanity, sexual context – sometimes highly sexual, and inappropriate comments.

Recently my car was vandalized to the tune of over $3K in damage. My only enemy is Sybil’s father-MS’s grandfather. He has harassed, threatened and intimidated me before. He was suspected of slashing our tires (3 different cars) in the same night after an argument with him. His wife called my work twice trying to get me fired. Suffice to say I am their #1 target. So when the police asked me who I suspected –I stated Sybil’s dad. We did not tell MS and kept her out of it because it’s none of her business. Sybil’s Dad on the other hand tells MS that we’re falsely accusing him and trying to get him in trouble. She gets angry at me and starts bashing me online calling me a F-ing B!tch. I find it, we lecture, she refuses to apologize and she is now grounded from the computer, her cell is taken away. She continues to act nice and sweet to my face and I am being immature and pretty much giving her the silent treatment.

In the past she has acted out like this. We were driving somewhere and she said sh!t instead of shoot. I called her on it. She denied it as though I didn’t hear it with my own ears. I argued with her and told her not to insult my intelligence. She proceeds to text her friend what a F-ing B I am and how she hates me and how she’s going to shoot me. She mistakenly sends the text to me. She gets busted and continues to treat me like I’m the greatest stepmom.

I know a little about sociopaths and she certainly has the make up for it – but is it really or is it just good old fashion teenage defiance….I used the think it was the latter…now I’m not so sure.